|Angry dyke with angry insides
||[Mar. 8th, 2007|03:42 pm]
I got my period yesterday- it's a week early; last month it was 3 weeks late. I had bad cramps last month, worse than usual but I dealt with it.
This morning, I got up for work at 4:30am and went to work. Then went to work and at 5:15am had to change my SUPER DUPER HEAVY DUTY-might-as-well-have-been-a-roll-of-paper-towels-tampon, wtf, it had been all of 45 minutes! At 5:30am I was having cramps so bad I was doubled over in pain, my legs were weak, I was nauseous, and had the chills. At 5:45am I was hysterically crying and my manager was calling around to see if anyone could cover my shift. I went home at 6:45am, called the doctor right away and got an urgent care appointment.
She put me on the pill. THE PILL. I'm a gold star lesbian; the last thing I thought I'd have to be on was The Pill. I'm pissed about it but she says it's going to, "lessen my flow" and the cramps, plus make me "regular." And I need to keep telling myself that. But GOD DAMN that sucks. Not to mention it's an extra $20 a month for the co-pay. Hey, as long as it doesn't feel like a hungry Doberman Pincher is gnawing on my insides, I'll be happy.
I tried to deal with the fact that I'd be taking not only be taking a new pill everyday but The Pill. Then I get it and it's pink. And the case? Pink. And not just like kind of pink or pink-ish. Capital P-I-N-K, PINK.
Seriously people, WHAT THE FUCK?! Is it really necessary? They couldn't be a neutral color? Yellow, green, any color other than fucking pink?! It's not bad enough I'm a Capital-"D"-Dyke that has to take The Pill but they're making me choke down a pink one with a matching pink case? They might as well have put little hearts on them too, or better yet, glitter. Maybe a little recipe on each individual pill so I could make a quick and easy one-pan casserole before I take it.
Just for kicks, I looked it up and uh-huh Viagra just happens to be blue:
So guys, you can still feel masculine and macho even though you can't get your limp dick up.